Woman Without Pants Tries to Flee on Toy Truck

A drunk woman crashed her Pontiac Grand Am into the side of a mobile home yesterday before attempting to flee on a tiny, battery-powered Power Wheels truck, all while pantsless. In a shocking twist, it all went down in Arkansas, not Florida.

Jamie Craft, 28, was not wearing any pants when she hopped on board the battery-powered toy truck — which has a top speed of just 5 mph — to make her escape.
Her attempted getaway came moments after she allegedly slammed herPontiac Grand Am into the side of a trailer home in Jonesboro, Ark., on Tuesday.
Cops gave chase — on foot — and arrested her within minutes. [NYDailyNews]
According to police, Craft was pretty irate when they caught up with her as well as being without any pants.
They say she was also very drunk, with a blood alcohol level of .217, which is 3 times the legal limit. [KTLA]

I was reading about The Artist is Present the other day, the documentary about the performance artist Marina Abramovic, who did stuff like make visitors walk between two naked people, and broke up with her boyfriend on top of the Great Wall of China – pieces that boring psuedo-intellectuals of course ate up like so much white-guilt dipped kale chips. I bring it up because I wonder when the true performance artists like Jamie Craft here are finally going to stand up and reclaim their medium from phony interlopers like Marina Abramovic. Abramovic does a piece, and people spend years trying to explain why it’s art. Meanwhile, crashing into a mobile home drunk and pantsless and trying to get away on a power wheels truck that moves slower than you can walk – that requires no explanation. To even attempt to explain it would be to tarnish its inherent beauty. It’s art because it is.

I eagerly await Jamie Craft’s first installation, The Artist Is Pantsless.

via filmdrunk.uproxx.com

Air Force relieves commander over sex scandal

via theeagle.com

A widening sex scandal at Lackland Air Force Base has led to the dismissal of the top commander who oversees basic training for every new American airman, officials said Friday.

Col. Glenn Palmer was commander of basic training for the 737th training group at the Texas base, where more than a dozen military instructors in the past year have been investigated or charged with sexually assaulting recruits. Officials familiar with the decision said Palmer has been relieved from those duties, speaking on condition of anonymity because the announcement was not yet public.

The officials said there was no indication Palmer was facing any criminal charges. In all, six instructors have been charged with offenses ranging from rape to adultery.

Investigators say more than three dozen female trainees have been victimized by male instructors at Lackland, where approximately 35,000 airmen graduate each year.

About one in five recruits are female, while most instructors are male. The most serious allegations involved an instructor sentenced to 20 years in prison last month after being convicted of raping one female recruit and sexually assaulting several others.

Before Staff Sgt. Luis Walker was sentenced in a military courtroom at Lackland, one of his alleged victims testified that the abuse left her shaken while deployed in Afghanistan and made her “a little bit more scared of everything.”

The Air Force also was set Friday to announce that Col. Eric Axelbank, commander of the entire 37th Training Wing at Lackland, also would be changing command next month. Officials told AP that Axelbank’s move was part of a normal change of command and was not related to the sex scandal.

Palmer’s dismissal comes just months after the Air Force increased his profile as the allegations mounted. He invited reporters in June to a daylong tour of Lackland, offering a rare glimpse into the base’s academy for military training instructors and making his top lieutenants available for questions. It was as intended to show the public that the Air Force had nothing to hide.

Palmer also began delivering a “neighborhood watch” speech to every new busload of recruits, telling them to immediately report sexual assaults or any hint of sexual harassment.

The first allegations began a year ago with those levied against Walker. As more trainees spoke up and the accusations became widespread, Lackland took the unusual step of halting training for an entire day in May to survey about 5,900 trainees. On a base that graduates a new class of airman every Friday for 50 of the 52 weeks in the year, Palmer called the training shut down so unprecedented that he didn’t even know whether it was possible.

Palmer isn’t the first Lackland commander removed since the scandal unfolded. Axelbank in June relieved Col. Mike Paquette, commander of the 331st Training Squadron, for what a military attorney described as a loss of confidence in Paquette’s leadership.

Lackland has about 475 military training instructors, who are the Air Force equivalent of Army drill sergeants and are assigned to turn raw recruits into airman over the course of eight weeks. More than three dozen instructors — including those facing criminal charges — have been removed from Lackland in the past year, but the Air Force says the majority of those dismissals were unrelated to the sex accusations.

Fake Money, Real Crime: Virtual Coins Stolen From Fordham Student:

Has the economy sunk so low we're reduced to the theft of virtual money? Today, the Post reports that two Fordham University students were robbed last month of nearly 5 billion "magic" coins used as currency in the (free) online fantasy game, RuneScape. And what better way to rob someone of fake money than with a fake gun?

Massachusetts resident Humza Bajwa, 19, allegedly made a deal with Fordham University student Jonathan Dokler to purchase the coins for $3,300 actual dollars, and Dokler sent buddy David Emani to make the trade. But when the two met up, Emani noticed Bajwa's cash was also fake. Emani called Bajwa out on the trickery, but Bajwa brandished a realistic BB gun and scared Emani off. "I whispered, 'Take it easy, man. No need for that gun," Emani said. "I couldn't believe I was about to get shot over RuneScape." Bajwa forced Emani to call Dokler and make him transfer the promised 4.7 billion coins, then let Emani go free unscathed.

Bajwa was arrested on July 24, and has been charged with second-degree robbery and grand larceny, which could give him 15 years in (presumably real) jail if convicted.

via gothamist.com

 

Alexandra Pennell, Central Connecticut State University Student, Fakes Anti-Gay Letters

A LGBT student at Central Connecticut State University who claimed to be the victim of anti-gay harassment has been discovered as the perpetrator herself.

Alexandra E. Pennell, 19, of Trumbull, reported that she had received anti-gay letters on eight separate occasions. She now faces charges “including falsely reporting an incident, fabricating evidence and making a false statement” reported the AP.

Pennell was arrested on May 2, and has a court date set for July 26 in New Britain, CT, where the university is located. She has pleaded not guilty.

In early March, Pennell reported that she had begun receiving anti-gay notes under her door. Mark McLaughlin, a spokesman for CCSU, reported at that time that the notes contained homophobic slurs and told the two students -- Pennell and her LGBT roommate -- to “die.”

The school responded seriously to the alleged harassment, holding a “Solidarity Rally” on March 13, where Pennell spoke. Around 300 students were in attendance.

“Central is my home just like it is every one of yours, and I’m proud to call it m home,” Pennell said to the audience. “I stand here today speaking to the person responsible for this, and all I have to say is I’m not going to be run out of my home and I will not be intimidated by hate.”

At the rally CCSU President Jack Miller encouraged students to speak up if they knew the person behind the hate letters, and stated that these sort of crimes will not be tolerated.

 

CCSU police then began an investigation into the crime, hoping to catch the perpetrator by setting up a camera outside Pennell’s dorm room. However, the device was conveniently unplugged in the instances that Pennell had said a new note arrived under her door, leading Lt. Edwards Dercole of the CCSU police to become suspicious.

A second camera was then planted outside in the hall closet, unknown to Pennell.

On April 5, police removed the initial camera telling Pennell that it needed repair. About an hour later, Pennell reported that another note was slipped under her door. While two officers took her complaint, Dercole inspected the second camera, which contained footage of Pennell putting the note under her own door.

A few days later the police confronted her. After a few attempts to persuade them of her innocence, she admitted to the crime.

Pennell reported that she created the scam because she wanted her roommate to spend more time with her, and that felt she was losing her close friends and her girlfriend.

Pennell has been suspended from attending any public school in Connecticut for the next five years.

A student at CCSU, who wished to remain anonymous, expressed their disappointment over the event.

“I’m shocked that she would go to that length to get attention,” the student said. “I’m happy that she was charged with those counts, and that she cannot attend a state school for five years, because she cannot cause that kind of drama. It’s sad because Central did show an outpour of support...when it was all kind of a hoax.”

via huffingtonpost.com